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We’ve put together a list of some of the best (amusing) Tinder bio’s, as discovered by r/tinder, to give you some ideas for your own profile description. Send me an emoji that represents our first date, I’ll send you an emoji that represents our future Seeking someone that looks good on the arm to take to social events!
At the very least, you’ll be amazed, possibly appalled, at what other people are writing! Which means I know how to ride a d*ck but I’m still not sure how taxes work. No thanks…if I wanted to disappoint two people in the same room, I’d have dinner with my parents. I hope your day is as nice as my ass I can’t wait to dissapoint you sexually Our relationship should be like Nintendo 64– classic, fun to spend hours with, and every issue easily fixed by blowing on it then shoving it back in.
On our first date I will carve our initials into a tree. I offer to go to the movies but you are tired/have to do laundry.
It’s the most romantic way of letting you know I have a knife.“Well honey, I met daddy when he told me he ate ass and asked me if I had snapchat” Let’s get pizza. I take you home and awkwardly hug you in your driveway. I get 2 favorites and a reply calling me a “fagit”.
Kinda girl you would take home to your mom but would blow you on the way there. If you can’t handle me at my worst I really commend and respect you for setting healthy boundaries for yourself. Skills include: giving head and completing entire games of Civ V.#dicknotdevotion What similarities are there between a 9v battery and my a**hole? You know you shouldn’t lick it, but you do it anyways.
(If it’s good enough for Hilary Duff’s Tinder profile, it’s good enough for you)Hi, I’m here for a boring time. I have small hands so it will make your dick look bigger.
I’m looking for a long term relationship probably involving a lot of hard work and hardly any sex. I like to pick the movies and if you don’t let me, I’ll tell everyone you beat me. If there wasn’t enough WTF profile’s already, here’s some more.
I’ll have your friends hating me while I control every aspect of your life. NYC editor who gets drunk and takes pictures a lot. If you can eat more Mc Donald’s cheeseburgers than me then I’ll suck your d*ck I have a pretty great rack Half-Filipino, Half-German, Physics major. If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best. Tinder, because the girls on Grindr were too hairy. In my free time I like to take my shirt off and take selfies. It’s like sex in space with meteors and satellites dancing past us as time stands still.
I like laughing, dogs, lots of food, beer, outdoor activities, and adventures. I’m super in shape thanks to my strict diet of Mountain Dew and twizzlers. When She’s walking home wards the monastery she thinks about how this is possible as she’s never had sex. The closest unicorn looks at your ass against the glass.